Forgiveness is a healing journey for the body and soul. Yet, even if you know in your heart that you want or need to forgive someone, the path toward peace can be difficult. But yet in order to move on and heal it is necessary to do so. At times we can find ourselves wanting to take back that forgiveness, but yet it is not ours to take back once we have forgiven.
There came a time in my life when I had to decide if I was going to live in the past or if I wanted to move forward into the future. I fought my pride of wanting revenge but for my emotional and physical health I needed to let go. I had to forgive a lot of people who hurt me throughout my life.
One of the people I had to forgive was my ex-husband for the emotional and physical abuse I endured for the two years we were married. I knew the odds were against me and I would probably never hear an apology for the way he treated me. There were times in my past it would come back to haunt me with flashbacks and memories and I would be filled with anger. I would question whether I truly forgave him. But I came to the conclusion, while I hated the actions he forced upon me, I forgave him. I felt someday he would have to go before God and be judged for his actions.
In the past month, I had to face the reality that my ex-husband who abused me could ask for forgiveness and become a Christian. I struggled with that and ask God why the only justice I felt I would ever receive would be his day of judgment, when he would go before God and answer for the things he did wrong. But after contemplating, I realized that God can reach anyone, and that person could be my ex-husband. As hard as it is to swallow, it is not my right to decide his fate. It is God that can change a person's heart and he can become a child of God.
So remember, when you forgive you are releasing the pain in order to be free and experience the peace of letting go. But realize that on earth we categorize the severity of our sins, but God forgives all those who have repented from their sins. Through the blood of Christ we are blameless through his eyes.
